Well, the new behavior patterns seem to be working. As I noted yesterday, I've been writing up a storm, and the only lapse in my schedule/activity has been the beer-drinking. Sticking to three a night ain't gone so well, but I haven't had more than four. Until tonight, that is, and that's because it's the beginning of my weekend, and I'm by no means drunk, just buzzing. I want to avoid getting indiscriminately soused over the next few days, however; I'm tired of doing so just for the sake of it, and if, as I suspect, I end up spending at least two of my three weekend nights alone at home, I don't want to waste them by getting drunk (and almost inevitably depressed).
I hope I can maintain this level of discipline for as long as it takes to achieve... what? I don't know, exactly. I reckon I mainly just want to keep the old corpse in decent shape, and not let drinking, or deep gloom, or nocturnal loneliness get in the way of writing. Unheimlich, and my own perception of myself as a writer, are too important to piss or groan or lachrymate or sleep away, like I seem to have been doing for far too long now. This is what I meant to do when 2006 began, but better late than never.
Y'all take it easy, and don't forget I love ye.
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