Saturday, October 17, 2020

Dungeon Crawling, Heavy Metal: Throne of Iron's "Adventure One"

Getting folks together to play Dungeons & Dragons or another tabletop RPG is always a chore these days, and by "these days" I mean "ever since college." The pandemic has made things somewhat easier for those who play over Zoom, something I haven't tried yet but probably will, sooner or later. Still, ever since I started playing in 1989 or 1990—I never remember which year it was, but it was fifth grade—one of the biggest appeals of the game, and role-playing in general, was reading the rulebooks and setting material and writing up all the characters, places, and events you might someday use in an adventure. As it turns out, the solitary side of what's meant to be a social pastime is as meaningful and fun as playing the game itself! Well, kinda; during all that time spent drawing dungeon maps and creating NPCs, you always hope you'll get to put it into action with some friends after school or on a Friday night, sharing a pizza, a two-liter of soda or a sixer of beer, a bunch of dice, and, inevitably, one measly pencil sharpener.

My experience with heavy metal parallels my D&D career, and is probably similar to a lot of other metalheads'. You get into metal at an age when music is just starting to mean something—entertainment, the source of a burgeoning identity, emotional catharsis, you name it—and it just makes sense. It fuckin' rules. If you're lucky, you have a metalhead friend or two with whom to share the experience, first of listening to shared albums and then going to shows, but it's basically a solo endeavor. If going to concerts is like playing D&D with a proper group, listening to metal records in your bedroom is like reading the Dungeon Master's Guide or the Cyclopedia of the Realms and figuring out what magic items to put in the stash the PCs will find if they don't fuck up too badly. (This is something you'd likely do, of course, while listening to heavy metal in your bedroom, so the comparison is even more apt, I'd say.)

It goes without saying that heavy metal and D&D have a long shared history. Orcus only knows how many metal records contain songs about the band's player characters, or how many D&D monsters and villains have been inspired by metal.  Throne of Iron, however, is one of the few bands that puts the D&D connection front and center, which is one of the things that drew me to them. The band's logo uses the distinctive font from the BECMI D&D boxed sets from the '80s, they've released four singles in the "Roll for Metal" series, which utilize randomly-generated riffs and lyrics, and Adventure One, the band's first full-length, plays out like a D&D adventure, complete with a Dungeon Master, the clatter of dice, and player commentary (The disappointed "fuck" when someone makes a shitty roll for initiative is something we've all uttered.) The combination feels natural, and the somewhat jokey gameplay elements don't detract from the musical at all. Hell, it's all just fun. Watch the "Lichspire" video and you'll see what I mean.

Throne of Iron, you'll be shocked to learn, plays heavy metal in the traditional early '80s vein (which you'll have figured out if you watched the video I linked to a sentence ago.) Think Manilla Road, maybe, with less distinctive vocals, but don't worry about comparisons too much. It's not ground-breaking, but it doesn't try, or need, to be. It's just good, solid, heavy metal full of reliable riffs, mid-tempo chugging, and that admirable quality of being equally worth listening to carefully while you're rolling up stats for that sentient magic sword, or putting on in the background while your party sets out to cleanse the lair of a long-dead wizard of the gelatinous cubes who've moved in. 

So grab a Lone Star—or whatever cheap local beer they drink in Bloomington, Indiana, where Throne of Iron is from—and your dice bag, put on Adventure One at a suitable volume, and enjoy the best of what D&D and heavy metal have to offer. Whether you're alone or with friends, you'll have fun, which is something everyone from the lowliest nerd to the most beer-fueled hesher needs in these dark days. 

May all your 20s be natural, dudes, and long live heavy metal!

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